Sunday, September 13, 2009

Open up, and there I go? Part 1

Ahoy Crypto-Scouts!

I've been submitting articles to the GEEKY & FREAKY World News WEEKLY for quite some time... without any luck. As a matter of fact, my unfailing ability to collect rejection letters (courtesy of their editorial staff) is one of the reasons why Monster C.H.O.W. exists. I have to get this important data to the public somehow!

With that said... I have FINALLY made the front page, just not in the way that I had wished. It seems the G&F "writers" have been fabricating stories about yours truly. Not just tall tales, but twisting my scoops into bold-faced LIES!


Taking preemptive measures, I am forced to defend my field survival abilities before my readers fear the worst. Readers, fear not! I am obviously UNeaten, as I am communicating this Crypto-Log to you presently (no internet connection within the bowels of hippopotami, you see). Exactly what I WAS doing near and around that river beast's maw will be revealed in due time.

Until then... Cryptically yours (and still undigested),
*The Crypto-Scout

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